Thursday, April 15, 2010
I realize everyone has a tough day here and there. Some have it tougher than others daily. I know this to be true, so I try to put my tough days in perspective, for they don't happen everyday.
Today is kind of tough. Why?
Well, as I've mentioned in prior posts, while it may seem that I "put it all out there" on this blog, I do practice discretion and keep various pieces of personal information in the vault.
I am aware that there are some who probably read my blog and Facebook posts and think, "Geez. That girl is all over the place." Well, in response to this, let me share a sliver about my life that I feel comfortable communicating here.
A member of my family has an illness that we've yet to get a handle on.
That's all I'll say.
Now, I've been tempted to respond to this situation by holing up, as if in a cave, and spending my days rocking back and forth or banging my head against the wall.
I've chosen, however, to go on the OFFENSIVE to combat the "woe is me" scenario that I battle daily.
Today, I CHOSE to workout, play tennis, take a walk with the dog, grab coffee for the teller at the bank, chat with a girlfriend, read to my son, and write.
I CHOOSE to run two home businesses in Beachbody and Mary Kay which keep me adequately distracted on days like today. It is necessary that I have something of my very own in which to pour my energy outside of the energy I pour into being a wife and mother.
My body, on the other hand, wants me to crawl in bed, draw the drapes, and just lay there. Beaten.
Can't do it. I am needed around here. I need to be at my spiritual, physical, emotional, and mental best. So, I make the time (sometimes at the expense of placing my children in front of the TV - gasp) to pray, exercise, gather with girlfriends who "get me" and whom are aware of our situation, read/write, and yes, run my skincare and fitness businesses. I must choose these things for myself or the whole ship goes down.
Many will say, "You can't carry this alone. You need a break."
That's what I just mentioned . . . I do take breaks. Many of them. Just now, Zane and I finished reading "Oh The Places You Will Go" (which speaks to my situation quite well, I should say), and National Geographic Kids. He is now watching Cartoon Network while I get my thoughts out. I have no remorse about that. I have one hour. For then, I must pick up Harper for an appointment and do the after-school rush.
So, I DO choose breaks for myself.
Today, I needed a reminder as to why Beaver has been so very therapeutic during our current state of affairs. Walking with the dog to the post office, the bank, Starbuck's (free coffee day with mug), back to the bank to deliver coffee to one of my favorite teller's, stopping in a hair salon where my whiz of a hairdresser just came on board, introducing myself to the manager of the local bike shop, and meeting neighbors all along the way, remind me that this lifestyle is exactly what the Doctor (and I do mean doctor with a capital "D") ordered for me and my entire family - Scout included. For my Doctor knew we'd be battling this medical difficulty and I truly believe He wanted us to fight it here. In Beaver.
So, today may be tough, but I stand reminded that today is also good.
And for the rest of you with tough days . . . and I know who you are . . . get out of "bed", open the drapes, take a shower, get dressed, and make a list of some ways that you can get refreshed. And then, as a family, figure out how Mom can get refueled.
I know you are sputtering. I was sputtering this morning as well. But my very smart father taught me that it is better to drive offensively, rather than defensively. I agree with him.
So I will do my best to push onward.
Just wanted you to stand in my shoes for a bit.